FEBRUARY EVENT CATCH-ALL

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FEBRUARY EVENT CATCH-ALL

▶ WHO: Yusuke and you!
▶ WHAT: An art boy nerds out over the latest exhibition in Lunatia.
▶ WHEN: During the event
▶ WHERE: Lunatian Archives, city streets
▶ WARNINGS: None for now, will add as necessary.

▶ BEWARE OF TEN-TICKLES - B

[Yusuke is excited by the hitherto unseen artworks, some of which he'd read about in artbooks about Lunatian art history but had been closed to the public until now, others unknown to him altogether. He spends hours simply wandering the halls, stopping to read an explanatory plaque, or standing and simply staring at a tapestry for seemingly hours on end, noting everything from the craftsmanship to the use of colour. Other times he has his sketchbook at the ready and will draw a particular artefact that catches his interest.

Of course, he's just as interested in the main piece as anyone else, but he waits for some of the initial crowds to disperse before he approaches, sketchbook tucked under one arm and mumbling to himself.]

"The Legend of the Fisherman's Wife"? Fascinating. Had I not known these were worlds apart, I would wonder if this were influenced by Hokusai's masterpiece in woodblock print erotica, "The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife". But this time, the roles are merged, and the woman is both octopus and lover to a new, male figure... Is their gaze more of love than of lust, I wonder, or perhaps both...?

[Yusuke's endless stream of musings on tentacle porn is seemingly never ending, and he flips open his sketchbook once more to begin to make some cursory sketches. This, too, will be inspiration for later.]

▶ GOING BANANAS - B

[By this point Yusuke has been in the Archives for most of the day, and his stomach is growling to signal he really should leave and find something to eat. Undeterred, however, he hears tell of a limestone panel that gives visitors bananas if they manage to amuse it. He contemplates it for a good while, but no jokes come to mind.

Tapping his pencil on his chin, he calls to the nearest passerby.]

Excuse me. Do you know any good jokes? I wish to procure a banana.

▶ DARLING, IT’S BETTER DOWN WHERE IT’S WETTER - A

[Yusuke had wanted to investigate the case of the missing statue. He'd carried out a heist on an art museum, how hard could it be to track down a fellow art thief and restore the statue to its rightful place?

Extremely difficult, as it turns out. Yusuke is returning back home for the evening, wondering if he should send a message to his fellow Thieves to organise an investigation, when Osse finds him. Momentarily stunned by the scream, he finds himself ensnared by her, and desperately tries to push himself free.

Which works only for a moment, because she begins to bawl out tears, trapping him in an orb rapidly flooding with her tears. He tries to push against it and strike to to escape, but to no avail.]

Let me go! You've mistaken me for another! [He's getting desperate, and the water is rapidly rising up his chest and to his shoulders, so he calls as fast as he can--] Come, Kamu Susano-o--!

[But his Persona doesn't appear, not even his kitsune mask materialises, and he has to hold his breath as the water submerges him completely.]

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[Kay was walking home, too. The missing statue had yet to be recovered, but there had been reports of the said statue roving about. It was an odd story, but not an impossible one. Idly she kicks a pebble and watches it bounce on the pavement before looking up again - wait, there was something large, tear-shaped and blue. And someone was inside it.]

Huh?

[She sprints toward it.]

Wait! Hold it! Objection! [Kay dramatically points to Yusuke trapped in the orb filled with water and cries out:] I love you and I think you're cool!

[The first part is completely fake, but the second part isn't. Just in case Osse doubted her sincerity.]

[The bubble bursts, and Yusuke is dumped unceremoniously to the floor, coughing and spluttering. Osse looks on in confusion, and Yusuke is equally baffled as he looks up at Kay.]

K-Kay?! What did you say--?

[It hadn't even occurred to him that Kay might be lying, confused as he is in the moment.]

[She drops down to offer him a hand.]

You heard me! I said, I think you're cool!

[Does she have to keep up the act while Osse is around? Kay decides to run with it just in case, or she might wind up trapped in a water-filled orb.]

And I wanna go on a date sometime!

[That's not entirely untrue, at least. Friendly dates count, right?]

Edited 2020-02-27 00:14 (UTC)

[Souji didn't intend to check out the monkey exhibit, but his casual strolling had let him to it. He had found himself in a bit of a pickle since his humor, well, is a bit of an oddity. Some find it funny because of the blank expression he has when he tells it, the others think he's just weird.

When Yusuke asks him about a joke, his mind whirrs even more, trying to dig up something good and funny and-]

Cats love to eat mice crispies for breakfast.

[-ah. Hm. Maybe not.]

[Yusuke turns to Souji, and it takes him a moment, but when he realises the intended joke his face breaks into a smile.]

Ah! An exsqueakingly good fact.

[...Which is when he's pelted in the face with a rotten banana, and gives an indignant, 'Hey!'. Try again, losers.]

[Well at least someone out there appreciates Souji's type of humor! Bad puns plus cats is always funny, right? Right.

The banana isn't funny though and Souji gives Yusuke a worried look.]

Are you alright? [He's wary to say another joke now.]

[Naoto has to keep an eye on everyone, but fortunately, Yusuke isn't someone she has to closely observe. There's no rule in Lunatia against an artist doing artist things like sketching the statue, but him talking to himself might bother other visitors.]

[Yeah, she'll just occasionally look back to make sure no one's disrupted and the art remains untouched.]

Ah, you must have a trained eye...

[Yusuke eventually stops sketching and looks over at Naoto, who he noticed looking over every now and then and lingering in the hall.]

While the other visitors move on, you stay and linger with interest in this piece, as I do. What is it about this that captures your attention?

[... He hasn't realised she might be working here.]

[Looking his way again, she's at a crossroad. She could humor him, tell him she was working, both, or just stay silent. Uh.... she could try?]

... I suppose the eyes, but mainly due to the guests wondering if they've been moving.

[There. She had successfully socialized...]

[ Elizabeth had been just passing by, a whole bunch of bananas under her arm which she's eagerly devouring. She pauses at Yusuke's question, racking her brain to try to think of something that she, at least, would find humorous. ]

Oh, I've got one! If William Penn's aunts kept a pastry shop, what would be the prices of their pies? The pie-rates of Penn's Aunts!

Edited 2020-02-25 22:27 (UTC)

[There's a long silence, in which Yusuke seems to be pondering the joke. He supposes it must be a cultural reference he hasn't come across, but he's gotten no further than opening his mouth to ask for clarification when a rotten banana bounces off his head.]

W-what?! What did I do to deserve that?! [He glares at the panel. RUDE.]

[ She looks quite mortified that her attempt at a joke had got a rotten banana thrown at him, and puts her hands on her hips as she glares at the panel. ]

Oh, come on. Don't punish him for my bad jo--

[ She can't even finish her sentence before a rotten banana hits her cheek and slides down to the floor. ]

While Hokusai is indeed a good point of reference, I doubt this can be considered a form of shunga. It isn't quite as explicit, after all.

[ His head is tilted to get a better look at the statue. And there's a furrow to his brow. Something else comes to mind, no matter the subject. He spares a glance to Yusuke's sketchpad. Looks like someone's busy.

Ah. Then it hits him, especially when he finally reaches a particular angle. ]

Rather, I find myself reminded of Michelangelo's Pieta.

[ And he motions to the way the man lies in the octopus woman's arms. ]

There. That prone position is almost the same way the fallen Christ lies in his mother's arms... though their gaze certainly is far from familial.

[ You've met your artistic match, Yusuke. ]

[Yusuke stops drawing to listen intently, and as he motions, Yusuke moves to stand beside him to observe the same angle. Then a lightbulb seems to ding in his mind.]

Oh, I see it! What an inspired perspective!

[He turns to a fresh page, scrapping all the previous sketches as inadequate by marking them with a large X, even if to the average passerby they would look perfectly serviceable. Then he begins to draw once more.]

I have never seen that sculpture in person, only images. To be near something so similar and yet different is quite breathtaking.

[ He tilted his head slightly, trying to get a better look at the statue. Yes... the more he looks at it, the closer he sees the resemblance. ]

I hear it's more breathtaking in the flesh.

[ He isn't exactly allowed to go sightseeing in the Vatican, you see... ]

I'm afraid I'm not as familiar as with the story behind this particular statue.

[Gumshoe was here, both to look at the exhibits and also to help out with various odd jobs. As he approached the statues, he brightened up as he recognized the boy sketching by it.]

Oh hey, it's you! Yusuke, the hungry boy! How's it going, pal? [He smirks as he looks towards the sketchbook and adds lightly.] Lookin' to add to the gallery?

[Thereth is a fellow artist, stationed at a nearby bench with her own sketchbook. She's interested in the statue, yes, but she's also been watching the other visitors, and Yusuke is no exception. Sorry if she's listening in, but he seems to just be talking to himself, so...once he trails off and starts sketching, she gives him a minute and then pipes up politely.]

May I see, dear? [She wants to make friends with the weird tentacle porn guy!]

"Oh, man. Jokes. You want jokes?" Kairon cleared his throat. "A local king's treasury's just been robbed, and thanks to all the wards on the treasure vault, he knows it has to be a wizard who broke the spell. Trouble is, there's only one wizard in town who knows where the treasure vault is and has the magical power to break into it, and that's the wizard belonging to this party of adventurers that's been helping him with some off-the-books jobs he's needed doing.

So the King orders that a squad of paladins be dispatched to bring in the wizard for questioning, and of course the party's really confused because as far as they know, their wizard buddy was with them drinking all night after a successful adventure, and they tell the paladins this, but the paladins just aren't hearing it. Knowing his friends have got his back, the wizard agrees to go quietly and await trial while his friends clear his name. Unfortunately, the trial's in four days, and the King's not known for being lenient on crime. They know that if they fuck this up, their friend's going to the gallows.

The party fighter says 'Nothin' goes on in that castle that the servants don't see. I'm gonna go down to the tavern closest to the palace and knock some heads around, see if anybody knows anything.' Everyone agrees this is a great plan, so they tag along. And the fighter does his best, really he does, he presses the palace servants for every bit of information he can, but nobody knows anything and the party goes home, dejected, knowing that in three days their friend the wizard is going to die.

The next morning the rogue says 'I'm gonna talk to some of my black market contacts. A haul that big? Nobody's gonna be able to move that alone, they need the help of a fence. I guarantee you guys somebody knows something.' Everyone agrees this is a great plan, so they see the rogue off. And the rogue does her best, really she does, she schmoozes and calls in all the favors she's got, but nobody knows anything and the party goes home, dejected, knowing that in two days the wizard is going to die.

The morning after that, the cleric says 'I will pray to my god, for she is the god of the moon, and all things that pass under the veil of night are known to her and her celestial servants. Someone up there must have witnessed the crime.' Everyone's running out of ideas at this point, so they tell the cleric to give it a shot. And the cleric does his best, really he does, he burns the finest incense and begs his celestial patrons for their help or else his friend will be executed for a crime he didn't commit, but the gods can't interfere in the affairs of mortals, and the party goes home, dejected, knowing that tomorrow afternoon the wizard is going to die.

The morning of the trial, the bard suddenly stands up in the middle of breakfast and shouts: 'Wait! I know! The vizier did it!'
Everyone thinks this sounds desperate and stupid, so she explains further. 'No, I'm serious, it had to be the vizier, he looks totally shady and he wears all black and he has a curly moustache and a pointy beard! Nobody on the level looks like that!' At this point, the party has no other options, so they humor her in a half-baked plan to break into the chancellor's quarters while the trial's going on, figuring that they have to do something, even if it's illegal as hell.

So they break in without a hitch and the place is just covered in all kinds of eldritch carvings and runes and stuff, and everybody's starting to think that maybe the bard was onto something here when the Rogue finds a table with a bunch of freshly-dissected tentacles and teeth and one great big eye sitting in jars. The cleric, knowing a little bit about the planes, thinks it's gotta be a beholder eye, and from the state of the parts the rogue figures it can't be more than a couple days old. This is the only lead they've found and even if it ends in their being caught they've got a single potential witness who might've been stabbed in the back by their partner in crime. So, in a last-ditch effort, knowing that the trial has to be almost over, the cleric takes the great big eye and starts to resurrect the monster.

As it turns out, the bard's hunch was right. The beholder. Is. Pissed. The chancellor's secretly a warlock and he summoned this monster to help him break through the wards, promising an equal share in any gold and magic items in the vault, and agrees to help if it gets to personally kill the chancellor for betraying it. Grabbing everything they can carry, the party run as fast as they can to the courtroom and the fighter has to bust down the door- but they get there in the nick of time, just as their wizard friend is being lined up for execution. The chancellor was exposed and killed when he tried to run, the wizard got to live, and the treasure got put back in the vault where it belonged. Everything turned out great. It just goes to show you," he paused here, unable to stop the shit-eating grin that now finds its way onto his face.

"Truth is in the eye of the beholder."

Edited 2020-02-27 06:38 (UTC)

[Just about when Ren is frantically searching for his friends. It's kinda hard when part of you is now a fish, but with Satanel holding him, he's at least able to hover around as Joker.

He remembers when Yusuke got ensnared last time and fought for a lady he didn't actually like so when he saw him about to disappear in the block of water he panics.]

Yusuke! You have to kiss her!

[Shit he probably doesn't hear that. What was it someone had told him that might work? Right.]

YUSUKE! Did I mention I like you lately?!

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FEBRUARY EVENT CATCH-ALL

down where it's wetter - A

no subject

no subject

B (I wanted to go A, but cat jokes/puns, I had to)

of course!

no subject

Beware of Ten-tickles - B

no subject

no subject

Going Bananas - B

no subject

no subject

B Tentickles | Also hi, we've threaded before!

hello!! remind me what/when we threaded before?

I was a Deidara who tagged you over in Bakerstreet! Can't remember if it was a TFLN or not.

Ten-tickles B

Ten-tickles B

I am a bard, how could I possibly resist

▶ DARLING, IT’S BETTER DOWN WHERE IT’S WETTER - A